By Leslii Stevens Trauma Informed Yoga Teacher, ERYT500, YACEP, Ayurveda Practitioner
Parental alienation is a process where one parent manipulates a child into becoming estranged from the other parent. This heartbreaking dynamic often emerges during divorce, separation, or post-divorce, leaving the targeted parent sidelined and emotionally disconnected from their own child. It is a complex and deeply damaging issue, particularly for the child involved.
Signs of Parental Alienation
Some clear signs of parental alienation include:
The alienating parent consistently makes negative comments about the other parent in front of the child.
The alienating parent unfairly blames the other parent for the breakdown of the marriage or family unit.
False accusations of abuse or neglect are often made by the alienating parent to justify limiting contact.
The alienating parent threatens to withhold affection if the child shows any positive feelings toward the other parent.
The child may express no guilt or remorse when mistreating the alienated parent, often due to the manipulation they’ve experienced.
This phenomenon can feel like a death to the parent who is being erased, as if they’ve been wiped off the planet. The pain is raw, relentless, and without closure—unlike a physical death, where grief has a pathway, however devastating.
Parental Alienation in the Legal and Mental Health Systems
The concept of parental alienation remains controversial within the legal and mental health communities. While many parents and experts have witnessed its devastating effects firsthand, both the World Health Organization and the National Council of Juvenile and Family Court Judges have rejected the term as a formal diagnosis. Most mental health professionals are wary of its use, arguing that it oversimplifies complex family dynamics and can sometimes be misapplied.
However, despite the resistance, there is ongoing advocacy to include parental alienation in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM). If successful, this inclusion would help validate the experience of countless parents and children who endure this form of psychological abuse.
The Importance of Trauma-Informed Yoga
My journey into becoming a trauma-informed yoga teacher is deeply tied to the need for healing around these issues. When a parent is unjustly separated from their child, they experience a trauma unlike any other—one that can destroy the heart, mind, and soul. This is why I’ve dedicated my life to educating others about these dynamics and creating spaces for people to heal.
Trauma-informed yoga provides a safe, supportive environment for those who have been through parental alienation or other forms of emotional trauma. By focusing on the body, breath, and nervous system, this practice allows individuals to slowly rebuild their sense of safety and connection to themselves, something that can feel lost in the chaos of alienation.
Yoga helps to manage the overwhelming emotions, anxiety, and depression that come with living in this fresh new hell. It offers tools to cope, rebuild, and regain a sense of control, even in the face of the unimaginable pain of losing a child to manipulation and control.
Fighting for Your Rights
If you believe your child’s other parent is violating a custody order, you have the right to enforce those rights in family court. Legal action may not erase the emotional toll of alienation, but it can be a step toward reclaiming your relationship with your child.
The journey of fighting alienation is long and painful, but no parent should ever give up hope. Healing is possible, and with support from trauma-informed professionals and legal advocacy, there can be a path forward.
with love & light
Leslii
